I dedicate this week’s column to my boyfriend, who has endured the hundreds of complaints and whines escape my lips and my cell phone regarding the state of my feet. First of all, I lovingly refer to my feet as Hobbit feet, not due to any amount of hair mind you. My feet are small, but abnormally wide for my sex and stature. Therefore, Hobbit feet.
These Hobbit feet have supported me through many a trial, but have taken a beating doing so. No matter what shoes I don that day, my little piggies squeal in pain, and in return I squeal to the boyfriend. And even after a magical, magical foot massage (thanks boyfriend) my feet still ache.
Now, what is a girl to do when spending $50 a week on a pedicure/massage isn’t an option, and when she doesn’t have the technical skills to build a foot massage robot? Well, I’ve done a little research for you on some awesome ladygeek gadgets for your feet.
No, these are not Tauntaun feet, but this foot massager does promise warmth like that of a Tauntaun. I wouldn’t recommend trying these out during the summer, but as we enter the cooler seasons these could come in handy. The slippers aren’t detachable, which is a little disappointing, but I can imagine that sitting still would be just as nice.
With 6200 stimulation points and an extremely corny video advertisement, the SPOONK Travel Massage Mat actually looks really helpful. I can imagine multiple mats, one of the feet, one under the head, and one under the back. The mat’s stimulation points increase blood circulation, relax tense muscles, and induce the “feel good” hormones, endorphins and oxytocin, known to release feelings of wellbeing and calm. Heavenly. I want to wrap my footsies in one of these things.
For a simpler solution at a respectable price, a foot roller seems to be a great alternative to the boyfriend’s foot massage, not unlike any other device whose purpose is to stand in for the man of the house. Anywho, I might actually pick one of these up this weekend. It just seems like an easy way to relieve soreness at the end of a long day.
Oh, now here we go. I can’t imagine any foot massaging gadget overshadowing this here. Three custom modes to target your tiptoe, arch of the foot, and sole of the foot with adjustable kneading speed. You can also choose manual mode to target your interested areas with adjustable speed and two different massaging directions. Works great on feet, but also on calves. Remote controlled, the ease of this device is something to be celebrated and enjoyed.